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Wishcraft Ebook

Just a quick update with some news you can use.

After the conclusion of our series Dream Catching, I forgot to give readers the link to Barbra Sher's Wishcraft ebook website. For anyone who is interested in pursuing their dreams you can download and read the book at Wishcraft.com

30 Days to Success

Steve Pavlina has a great post on how to measure your personal growth in a manageable time set, in a 30 day time frame.

Controllable Anger

“If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. Regret and guilt can take up and literally waste hundreds of hours of your time; self-discipline only takes a few seconds. An ounce of “bite-my-tongue” outweighs a ton of “I am-so-sorries.” One test of our size and maturity is what makes us angry —and how we express our anger.

A boiling temper can escalate into an argument or a shouting match where both parties walk away having accomplish nothing and feeling worse. Like any other emotion, anger has a toxic way of infecting others directly or indirectly. It’s unrealistic to try to be pleasant every second of the day but whenever you feel like your on the verge of getting angry, stop and ask yourself two questions: Is this really worth getting angry about and will I still be angry about this 6 months from now?

If you answer "no" to both of those questions you shouldn’t get angry. Though, if you answer, “yes” you need to do something also- use your words rather than your voice. State exactly how you're feeling in a direct, non-emotional way. People will listen to you more readily than if you are shouting at them.

Another way to diffuse anger is to gain a new perspective on the events that upset you by reminding yourself everything happens for a reason and that reason is for me to learn from the event.

Healthy Selfishness?

Healthy?

Apparently, according to Dr. Rachael and Richard Heller who wrote the New York Times Bestseller Healthy Selfishness: Getting the Life You Deserve Without the Guilt. The authors ask readers the intriguing and somewhat surprising question “are you too good for your own good?”

You may be asking yourself “but, isn’t selfishness a bad thing? Only narcissistic people are selfish.” Being selfish, in a mentally beneficial way, will actually make you a more giving, happier and caring person. According to the authors the main concepts of healthy selfishness is “to respect your needs and feelings, even if others do not. Especially if others do not.”

You can read the first two chapter of their book at www.healthyselfishness.com

Clean Your House Without all the Grunt Work.

Believe it or not some people still haven't gotten around to Spring cleaning and getting their house ready for Summer. It's better do the cleaning now rather than be stuck inside in July while everyone else is out having their Summer fun.

Shaking out the rugs and dusting off your furniture aren’t the most exciting things to be do when the weather is starting to get nice but here’s a few tips to get the job done once and for all.

-Put everything in a bucket that you’ll need such as dusting rags, furniture polish, all purpose glass cleaner, paper towels, etc…

-Tabletop items such as books, pictures, and other decorative items should be cleared from a surface before dusting. If you find many items crowded on one surface you’ll want to display them around the room or put them in other rooms throughout your home.

-Dust off your furniture first before vacuuming. Wiping dust onto your clean floors will only make the task longer.

-Open the windows to allow the fresh air in and cleaning fumes/dust out.

-Get rid of everything and anything you don’t use any longer. Sell all these things either on ebay or in a yard sale. Throw away items, which aren’t “sales worthy”, just be careful one person’s trash is another person’s treasure. If you come across anything you think may be a valuable, set it aside and get it appraised/ research asap. You never know until you find out.

-Clear away clutter. Clutter seems to attract the most dust, once you go through them you will have made future cleaning tasks easier because there is less dust in the house. It is also important to minimize dust as much as possible for asthma suffers.

-If you hate cleaning and find yourself grumbling put on your favorite radio station or play some music to get back in the swing of things.

You can find a litany of information about cleaning as well as a cleaning checklist at marthastewart.com.

Jump Start Your Diet

Starting a diet or a fitness routine can be an empowering and exciting thing to do. As time goes by though those feeling of empowerment may wear off and turn to feelings of dread and annoyance, which quickly makes some people want to drop their diet or fitness routine all together. But there are some ways to combat diet fatigue and get back to your goals of a healthy lifestyle.

Here are some things you can do to get back on track:

Have a visual motivator.

Put up an ad of a fit model on your wall in front of your exercise area or hang a pair of jeans you want fit back into to motivate you towards your goal. This is a good method to fight off procrastination.

Recognize your achievements

Whenever you surprise your self by making that extra effort to achieve don’t say, “Wow, I can’t believe I did that.” Instead say, “I knew you had it in you. You really can do it,” (You can say this out loud if you feel empowered enough) it sounds cheesy, but this method really works in the long run. You can even do something special for yourself when you reach a milestone mark and are starting to see results of your effort.

You can read more here

Protect Your Identity

Just a quick update today with some news you can use.

As the worlds advances more with technology and transitions get easier, the ability for criminals to gain access to other people’s financial information. Criminals want your money- no matter how much you have.

About.com has some simple yet important tips to help protect yourself from identity theft and fraud. Here are a few tips the suggest:

-Don't give your Social Security number over the phone unless it is absolutely necessary.

-If you have a roadside mailbox empty your mailbox as soon as possible after the mail is delivered. And don't leave letters with personal information in the box for pickup by the mail carrier; drop them in at the post office or in a U.S.

-If your throwing away old financial records tear them up as much as possible or even buy a paper shredder and use it when you're disposing of records such as tax returns, or unwanted credit card offers.

-Never leave printed receipts behind at the bank, ATM machines or gas stations.

-Never give out credit card, social security numbers or other personal information on a Web site that isn't secure (A secure website will have a web address starting with https:// and a yellow navigation bar)

You can find more here

Dream Catching Conclusion

So you have seen you actually can take control of your life and accomplish your dreams-no matter what they are. Just to recap the major things you need to work toward that dream:

1. Brainstorming session
2. A plan of action
3. A goal calendar charting when you expect to reach it
4. A list of first steps
5. What you’re going to do tomorrow
6. Networks
7. A support base

If you still think you can’t accomplish your dream don’t give up on the dream, just fit aspect of your dream into your daily life and “see what happens” as Barbara says. If your wondering if you’ll be any good enough at doing the items on your list or calling a contact just do it and you will see. The key to remember is your not suppose to be an expert at what your about to do you are just starting out. You are more than allowed to make mistakes without punishment from yourself or others. Do it right or do it wrong, just do it. You’ll thank yourself later.

It’s one thing to read words on a page, which tell you to do something it’s entirely different to follow through with them and actually change words into action. You’re are the only one who can accomplish your dreams and no one else can stop you from accomplishing them or accomplish them for you. Everyday you make a decision to live your life, but some people don’t know they can make the decision to live their lives the way they want to not the way anyone else wants them to. You are born with the power and capabilities to do change your life and catch your dream.

If you liked this little series based on the book Wishcraft you can read the e-book of Wishcraft or buy the book.

We’ll be back with more next time.

Dream Catching: Double Up

To achieve your dream you absolutely cannot try to pursue it alone need someone to help you through the times when you feel resistance creeping up on you or when you just need someone talk to.

This person can be a family member; friend neighbor-it could be anyone who supports your goal. This person will become extremely important because they will keep you on track and focused on the tasks ahead. They can give you an extra push of encouragement or just about anything. It can even be a person who is putting up resistance to your goal.

You can actually get someone who opposes your goal to eventually support it. Here’s how, you need to allow them the right to not support it at first. When you walk into the room and announce your goal and if someone says, “Why would you want to do that?” Which in turn follows with you responding, “well, what do you mean why would I want to do that.” Eventually it ends up with you feeling defeated and giving up. Instead of giving up, let them know you understand how they feel.

Your shaking up their world and turning things around, suddenly things are changing; you’re changing. Change is uncertain and many people fear it. Just respond by giving whoever it is the right not to like the dream, to hate it, to throw a fit or be mad because you quit your job or are going against your parent’s wishes of you becoming a doctor. Go ahead and make the changes and follow your plan of action. You will work up certain energy as you go about your goal or dream.

You will give off a certain energy that will make people curious and inspired about your dream. The best gift you can give someone is the gift of giving off positive energy that reinforces relationships-directly or indirectly. Sooner or later when they see how committed and optimistic you are they will eventually support whatever goal makes you happy.

You can even find someone with the same dream and use each other as support anchors. Whether you get the support of people who have a common goal or a family member you can’t pursue your goal alone, you will need a support base sooner or later.

We’ll be back tomorrow with the conclusion to Dream Catching

Dream Catching: Brainstorming with a Group

So, as you've already done in this post, you’ve formulated all the ideas you can think of to start moving toward your goal. Though, now you have to get the help of other people to contribute ideas. That's where a group brainstorming session comes in.

Brainstorming are the ingredient dreams are made of and barn raising is the oven that turns them into a reality. You have to ask yourself “who do I know?”

You may find yourself saying, “Well, I don’t know anyone.” What you’re really saying is you don’t know anyone who’s rich, powerful and can make things happen with the wave of a hand. Those aren’t the people were concerned with (yet).

It could be anyone you know, friends, family, co-workers etc… You will be amazed at what these people know and what they can contribute to getting you your dream.

You can either ask these individuals for help one by one or you can throw what Barbara calls a “barn raising party.”

This is a great technique to get your dream. Gather your, friends, and family somewhere and hold a type of gathering. (Barbara suggests that the number of people shouldn’t exceed fifteen. A larger group requires longer planning, not to mentiona a large place they can gather.) Everyone can create strategies, swap ideas and exchange personal contacts. In addition to that you’ll have a great time while building a foundation for your dream.

The beginning and the end of the party can be all about the party; socializing and having fun, but in the middle it’s all business. You have the floor and let everyone know your dream, what you have come up with so far and what you still need.

You should try to be as specific as possible when asking for something. If your dream is to be a movie star or start your own restaurant and you simply ask for “help” many of your guests will just smile sympathetically, shrug their shoulder’s helplessly or offer answers that aren't really what your looking for.

Though, if you ask for second hand pots and pans or if anyone knows someone in the media industry you will get more helpful responses. If don't know what you need, ask for more ideas. Barn raising is a excellent way to get your dream off the ground and get it into action immediately.

You need a plan to start getting on the road after you have established your networks. You need to follow up on information and contacts. There’s nothing worse than getting an unexpected phone from the person you met a week ago asking if you followed up on their information when you haven’t.

Most of your plan stems from the information you have gained through your networks, but you need to create some of it to reach it. You can have the key to your dream in your hand, but it is only you who can open the door with it.

You need to break down your goal into easy to manage steps so you can implement them immediately. Work backwards from the goal itself so you can have a clearer picture of what you need to do. Fill in the early stages with information from your networks. As you begin to follow up on contacts and gain more information you will see what steps you need to create in order to reach the next one.

For example you can’t become a model until you have an agent and you can’t have an agent until you have gone to a modeling agency. The key is to keep the steps small enough so you can start doing them tomorrow.

We’ll be back with more tomorrow.

Dream Catching: Paving the Way to Your Dreams

You need to have a definitive plan to reach your goal. It is essential to know what your doing and how your going to do it. How you catch your dream is by using the resource of your mind and the people around you. But before doing that you need to solve the problems you listed a while ago.

I’ve mentioned that you can solve almost any problem-including money problems money problems and how you can solve those problems is by using your head and collaborating with the people you know.

It’s called brainstorming and barn-raising in Wishcraft. Coming up with ideas on your own until you can’t think of anything else and then getting other people to help give you ideas of how to reach your dream.

We’ll begin first with brainstorming on your own. Take the list of problems you wrote down or if your just joining us take out a sheet of paper or open a word document and write down all the problems that stand in your way.

Once you’re done, go down the list and start solving those problems any way you can. Feel free to write down absurd or crazy answers such as "marry a millionaire" to solve money problems or "hitchhiking to New York" if your dream is to live in the Big Apple. No idea should be disregarded.

When you’ve finally gone down your entire list of problems and have written your solutions start to list the pros and cons of each solution. This will automatically get rid of the solutions which would be too crazy to act on, such as doing something illegal or putting yourself in any kind of danger or jeopardy.

Once you think you have brainstormed all you can and you think you’re out of ideas, you are not. You need to gather the ideas of other people in a group brainstorming session.

We’ll back with that next time.

Dream Catching: The Pursuit of Happiness

As stated in the previous post once someone gets over the road block of actually pursuing their dream they need to plan ahead and make goals.

One of the most important parts of getting your dream of is by establishing goals for yourself. You need to know what you want and how to get what you want in a manageable manner, so that you are actually able to start pursuing that dream tomorrow.

Your dream whether it is big or small is are easily attainable if you set goals for yourself and stick to a structure or even set up some guidelines for yourself. Barbara Sher has some to simple but essential rules to follow for setting goal's:

Rule #1: A goal is concrete

Rule#2: When you say "this is what I want" your not fooling around. This is what you really want or always wanted.

You must stick to your target deadline of a goal. A target deadline will depend on the specific goal. If your dream is grand and big the target deadline will be in the future. Though, you don't want to set the final deadline too far in the future or else you might slip into a cycle of laziness; reminding yourself you have "plenty of time" to work toward the goal.

A deadline of a year or two gets you into action within a few weeks if your dream is big because you think you only have a year or two to achieve your dream. Stick to the goal and set up a structure of how to obtain the final goal through smaller goals. You want to work toward a dream in a manageable way, a manner where you can do something tomorrow (more on that next).

You also want to make sure what you decided is really what you want or if your dream is really what you've always wanted. You don't want to work hard toward something and find out it is not something you want or is not what you expected. One good way stated in Wishcraft to test if your dream is really something temporary is to ask yourself would you rather dream about doing it or you'd you be happy actually doing it?

Another method mentioned is to imagine yourself in the future after you have accomplished your dream. In other words, dream of the future in first person. Do you love it? Can you imagine yourself doing it for years?

No dream or goal is written in stone so, if you think you have uncovered a false dream (something you think you should want but know it isn‘t your true dream), you can always search for a new one using methods discussed in the post regarding your
original self.

Dream Catching: Road Blocks

So, as we figured out in the last section you now know what your really want but, realism sets in. Can you really get everything you want by tomorrow? Most likely not. You know there is a difference between fantasy and reality. You need money, networks or other things to get your dream on the road to reality.

You most likely have some of these problems getting in the way of your dream; money, age, confidence, experience, it could be any type of problem. One method to begin conquering these problems is to write them down; whatever they are.

Once you’re done writing them down and you look over them you could start to feel overwhelmed or even depressed- you haven’t even began to pursue your dream yet and you‘re already feeling like you can‘t do it.

Though, Barbara Sher has something to say about your problems,

“Those are the easy ones! Those are the fun ones. They’re purely a matter of strategy and game plans.”

Here’s an example she uses to illustrate her point. Suppose you want to get across a river. There’s no bridge anywhere in sight and building a bridge is an overwhelming and time consuming task. You’re going to have to sail across, but what if you don’t have a boat? Borrow one. What if you don’t know how to sail? Get someone to do it for you. (Barbara Sher is a living resource of helpful ideas and comes up with some you never even thought of)

This is called strategic problem solving. I can imagine some of you are saying “yes but, it’s not that simple.” The phrase “yes but” sets off a mental dilemma Barbara calls the “yes but game.” Suddenly, these simple strategic problems become unsolvable riddles that are now the eighth wonder of the world.

What you’re really doing by saying “yes but” is your subconsciously complaining about doing whatever it is you’re about to do. You can actually start to use those subconscious complaints and feelings to your advantage through something Sher calls the power of negative thinking.

We’ll have more on that tomorrow

Dream Catching: A Sucessful Enviroment

As we learned in our last section the environment you were brought up in is incredibly important to catching your dream and becoming successful. Your childhood environment creates your current enviroment. An environment can literally make or break someone. The environment you grew up in has shaped who you are today. If you want to start living a better life you need to reflect on your childhood environment.

Barbara Sher, will be our guide for the rest of this section and will help us along in our quest for success. Very few people are better at self-improvement than Barbara is and her writing actually jumps out off the page and speaks directly to you.

First Sher wants us to ask ourselves some important questions:

"Were you treated as though you had a unique kind of genius that was loved and respected?

Were you told you could do and be anything you wanted-and that you'd be loved and admired no matter what it was?

Were you given real help and encouragement in finding out what you wanted to do-and how to do it? Do you blame yourself in not becoming all they said you could become?

Were you encouraged to explore all your talents and interests even if they changed from day to day?

Were you allowed to complain when the going got rough and given sympathy instead of being told to quit?

Were you bailed out when you got into trouble without reproach?

Were you surrounded by winners were pleased when you won?" (It could be anyone who was happy to see you succeed)

If you answered “yes” to all of these not only is Barbara Sher jealous but also so am I. If you answered “no” to some or most, think about how your life would be different if you answered yes. Where might you be today, who might you have been?

Don’t be dismayed because it’s never too late to bet the person you might have been. We'll have more on that tomorrow.

Dream Catching: Part II

As stated in Part I , you must do what you want and live where you want; this is essential for living your best life and it is the law to a life of fulfillment. But how do you even start to begin to do either of those things if you don't know where to start? They are both daunting tasks in and of themselves.

It’s not as daunting as you think it is if you break down the stereotypes attached with being successful. You may imagine the typical things attached to being successful, a life of luxury. Those are things attached to success and indicators of success. We want to go deeper into your perception of success and living your best life.

Here’s a poignant question, if you were to live today as if it were your last would you love what you’re doing that day? If you begin to ask yourself this question for a few weeks and you answer “no” most of the time, something needs to change very soon.

Each person needs to live their best life for that very reason and you know you’re not going to leave this earth without living a life you love. You can start tomorrow by doing something small and simple that will get you on the road. But how do you get on the road? Where’s the on ramp?

You can find that road by imagining your best life and what a typical day would look like. It’s very probable you could be thinking of mansions and millionaires. As stated before, even though those things are attached to success, they aren‘t your own individual dream- they are the results of your dream. Do what you love and the money will flow. You can be very wealthy and do what you love also. If your dream involves you driving a Ferrari and living in an estate you are entitled to that have that future Ferrari and that estate. But for now, go deeper than the end result by doing the following.

Ask yourself these questions: What did you love to do when you were young? What fascinated you? Do you still love it now?

If your original self has been left behind in the past, congratulations! You have just reconnected with it.

Though, now your thinking, “well, what does my ‘original self’ have to do with living my best life?”

Your original self has to do with applying what you loved as a kid (and still do) and applying it to your life now. How can people start doing that? They need to create an environment that nurtures what they love do.

More on that next.

Nothing for Nothing

Jim Edwards, successful internet marketer and entrepreneur, released a very interesting video this week explaining why individuals who rely on free information for their e-business will most likely never get the results they desire.

He explains people dependant on free information are getting cheated out of the top level information, the type of information that can skyrocket their online success.

You can read more at his, blog

Dream Catching: Part 1

We'll start our new series with taking a trip back in time to your past.

When you were a little kid how many times did you hear the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

You may have asked yourself the same questions even when you were only six. But on the other hand how many times did you hear “just who do you think you are?” from your parents. This probably wasn’t asked in an inquisitive tone. It was most likely asked by one of your parent’s when you were doing something you shouldn’t have done. It could have come when you were playing or experimenting with a newfound interest.

Though, as people get older they start to ask themselves the same question.
How many times have you asked yourself that question, it could come out of nowhere, when you least expect it.

“What am I doing with my life.” or “where is my life going?” It could even be followed by “is this all there is to my life? There’s more to life than... well, this.” Most people want to gauge exactly where they are in life and especially want to know where their ife is headed, no matter what their age. We all just want a map with a big X on it that states “you are here.” But instead of the map stating "you are here" besides the X it should state, “who are you?”

Some people may think, “Well that’s a strange question. I know who I am. I’m me.” Think about the things that give you your self-identity. Your job, your educational background, etc…

Author of the best selling book Wishcraft, Barbara Sher, has a very interesting thing to say about your identity. "None of those things are your identity." From Wishcraft,

“This may surprise you, but if I were sitting down with you to help you choose a goal and design a life individually tailored for you, I would not ask you for any of this information. I would not want to know what you do for a living, unless you were really excited by your job. I would not want to know any of the things you put in a resume--your background, your experience, your skills. All too often we are skilled in things we never really chose, things we have had to do--like typing or scrubbing floors (those were my skills)--not things we love.”

The things in life we’re skilled in are things we have to do to get a job in the current marketplace, not things we love to do. What if you could do what you love or live the life that you love? What do you want? What do you love?

That is your identity.

We’ll have more next on how to put what you love into action to live your best life.

Getting More from Life

We'll begin a new series called Dream Catching.

This series is designed to help you get what you really want out of life. We'll post a section of the seires every other day so you can take in the information and more importantly act on it.

You can be successful regardless of what people tell you. You can do anything with your life and live your best life at any age. Don’t think so? Head over to 43things.com and see what the world’s to-do list is. People all over the world, right at this very second are pursuing their dreams and are on a quest for their success.

Being successful in life means getting what you want out of life. Not what your parent’s want or what you think you realistically can want. It is centered around what your heart wants. What do you really want?

If what you want is ethical, moral and legal you can go succeed at getting it. You know you have succeeded when you love your life and find yourself strangely happier. You love your current state of life even though it has it’s ups and down’s. When you realize that, you are living your best life.

If you already love your life and have reached success, you may still find this information valuable. It doesn’t hurt to build upon what you already know. No matter how old you are, you are always learning and shaping your life.

However, if this isn’t you and you don’t think of yourself as successful than this will is exactly the type information you need and can use to put into action immediately. But how do you get there? How can you steer your life in the direction you want it to go in? It all starts with one question, how can I…?

We’ll have more on that next .

Unclaimed Money Grows to 14 Billion Dollars

There's a good chance you have some unclaimed money coming your way. That's because the total amount of unclaimed funds in the United States has topped 14 billion dollars and is growing.

Mellody Hobson, financial expert for Good Morning America, motivated viewers to get back their money with her May 1st appearance on the show's running special, 100 a Day in May. Shortly after the show. Many Americans sent phone calls and emails to relatives spreading the word. My family checked and found many relatives have unclaimed funds coming to them. Your probably do to.

You can go to abcnews to find out.